My Journey Continues

Disclaimer, this post has nothing to do with design, so if you don't feel like reading, I so understand...

Today, I turned 40.  


When I was 16, 40 seemed a lifetime away, now that I'm 40, 16 seems like yesterday.  This is the first birthday I've had where I actually had a little anxiety approaching it, not about turning the BIG 4 0 but about where I am in my life currently.  (Maybe I'm having a mid-life crisis... anywoo)

It's so easy to get discouraged if you're looking at the next person and measuring your success against someone else's life plus in the society in which we live today so much emphasis is given to staying young as if growing older is a disease.  It's especially harder on us women because the message is always out there pushing us to always compete to an ideal that no human person can achieve.

Today when I woke up, I was laying in bed and thinking about my life so far and I can I tell you the anxiety faded away.  While I still have many things I want to accomplish, I've realized that whatever I've done so far is enough.  As Oprah says 'I am Enough'.  When I immigrated to the US at 14 years old, my mom, my three siblings and I lived in one bedroom in my grandmother's house for three years until she could save up to move to an apartment.  Basically, we were poor but we had each other and I never look back on that time as a struggle because really all you need at the end of the day is a loving family.  With scholarships, loans and aid, I put myself through college and I have two pieces of paper on the wall that won't ever expire. :)  I have a great job, I own my house (well along with bank) and I have two great kids, all while being a single parent.

I've realized that we all have different paths we need to walk and measuring your life or journey against another person can be detrimental and will leave you feeling inadequate all the time.  However, while some of us will be superstars for the world, most of us can be superstars for our friends and family. 

I'm leaving you with one of my favorite people, Lady B, who has walked her own path to super stardom.  Her song, "I was here", says it all. I'm going continue walking my path and living my best life.  So I'm praying that God continues to bless and keep me because with him, all things are possible.  I'm looking forward to the next 40 plus years. 



 P.S. Happy Birthday to my twin, Lettie, who has decided that she going to be 36 forever.  :)



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3 comments:

  1. Happy Birthday to you! I totally feel you on this post as I am 37 and often fight with myself over my accomplishments and direction in life. Just know that you are truly an inspiration to many, more so than you'll ever know.
    About 6 months ago, I ordered that very same wall stencil you used on your guest room. Today I had free time to stencil my own, but laziness took over. And in my head, I though of your blog and your beautiful home and thought, how does she do it all? Stay fabulous and positive and thank you for this post!

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  2. First of all HAPPY BIRTHDAY! I can understand the anxiety. I am 33 and this year when I got married...I had a bit of an anxiety attack. You see, I got married and completed my undergrad degree both around the same time. Two major milestones that I thought would never happen. :-/ So, for a little bit, I started feeling like...down. On one hand, I was down because I felt so far behind my peers. But on another I felt overwhelmed like things were happening too fast. Oxymoron right? I felt like I had nothing else to look forward to in life and that could not be further from the truth. I just want to pay you on your back because IMO you have accomplished a lot in 40 short years! :-) Wishing you many many many more!

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  3. Thanks for the birthday wishes!!

    Topaz, trust me I have so many unfinished projects in my house it's crazy. It's ironic that I have a bathroom that's been dismantled for two months because I painted it and had grand ideas to stencil it but I haven't gotten around to it. Don't be discouraged, just do it when you're ready. And it's not laziness it's taking time out for yourself, which we all need from time to time.

    Ton, Congratulations on your degree and your marriage. I think sometimes when you work on a goal and it's accomplished you just need to regroup. I'm wishing you luck with all your future endeavors, I'm sure you'll be fabulous and you'll just dream a bigger dream.

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